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Life in the fast lane!!!
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Hello everybody, my name is Andrew T. Smith and I am introducing a new kind of web page. The jokes of the day. I would appreciate everyones ideas on the jokes and also a rating from 1-10 on how funny they are. A (1) being that it was a waste of time reading it and a (10) being freakin' histarical. Thank you for your cooperation and let's see how much fun we can have with this. I look forward to hearing from you all.
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Jokes of the day...
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This is kinda harsh, but funny and true...
>>>>
>>>>10 THINGS THAT PISS ME OFF
>>>>
>>>> 1.PEOPLE WHO POINT AT THEIR WRIST WHILE ASKING FOR THE TIME. I
>KNOW
>>>>WHERE
>>>>MY WATCH IS BUDDY...WHERE THE FUCK IS YOURS? DO I POINT AT MY
CROTCH
>>>>WHEN I
>>>>ASK WHERE THE BATHROOM IS?
>>>>
>>>> 2.THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY IS WAY TOO HAPPY...CONSIDERING THAT HE
>>>>DOESN'T
>>>>HAVE A DICK!!
>>>>
>>>> 3.PEOPLE WHO ARE WILLING TO GET OFF THEIR ASS TO SEARCH THE
ENTIRE
>>>>ROOM FOR
>>>>THE DAMN TV REMOTE BECAUSE THEY REFUSE TO WALK TO THE TV AND CHANGE
>IT
>>>>MANUALLY!!
>>>>
>>>> 4.WHEN PEOPLE SAY..."OH,YOU JUST WANT TO HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT
>>>>TOO"...FUCK OFF!!!! WHAT GOOD IS A DAMN PIECE OF CAKE IF YOU CAN'T
>>EAT
>>>>IT?
>>>>WHAT SHOULD I DO...EAT SOMEONE ELSE'S PIECE OF CAKE INSTEAD?!?!?!?!
>>>>
>>>> 5.WHEN PEOPLE SAY..."IT'S ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK"...NO
>>>> SHIT!!!!WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU KEEP LOOKING FOR IT AFTER YOU HAVE
>>>>ALREADY
>>>>FOUND IT?!?!? DO PEOPLE DO THIS? WHO AND WHERE ARE THEY?
>>>>
>>>> 6.WHEN PEOPLE SAY, WHILE WATCHING A MOVIE..."DID YOU SEE THAT"...
>NO
>>>>DICKNOSE...I PAID $7.50 TO COME TO A THEATRE AND STARE AT THE
>FUCKING
>>>>CEILING
>>>>UP THERE. WHAT DID YOU COME HERE FOR?
>>>>
>>>> 7.THE RADIO AD..."HI...I'M STEVIE WONDER...DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE.
I
>>>>DON'T!"...I HOPE YOU DON'T DRIVE SOBER EITHER STEVIE BECAUSE DID YOU
>>>>FORGET...YOUR BLIND?
>>>>
>>>> 8.PEOPLE WHO ASK..."CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION?"...DIDN"T REALLY
GIVE
>>>ME
>>>>A
>>>>CHOICE THERE DID YA BUDDY?
>>>>
>>>> 9.WHEN SOMETHING IS NEW AND IMPROVED' WHICH IS IT? IF IT'S NEW,
>THEN
>>>>THERE
>>>>HAS NEVER BEEN ANYTHING BEFORE IT. IF IT'S AN IMPROVEMENT, THEN
>>THERE
>>>>MUST
>>>>HAVE BEEN SOMETHING BEFORE IT!
>>>>
>>>> 10.WHEN A COP PULLS YOU OVER AND THEN ASKS YOU IF YOU KNOW HOW
FAST
>>>>YOU WERE
>>>>GOING? YOU SHOULD KNOW ASSHOLE...YOUR THE ONE THAT FUCKING PULLED ME
>>>>OVER!!!!!!!!!
>>>>
>>>> ISN'T THAT FUNNY...WELL THERE IS ONE MORE THING THAT REALLY
FUCKING
>>>>BUGS
>>>>ME...CHAIN LETTERS!!!!! WHO THE HELL THINKS THAT BY ANNOYING OTHER
>>>>PEOPLE
>>>>WITH STUPID MAIL WITH NO MEANING...THAT THAT WILL GRANT YOU A WISH..
>>OR
>>>>MAKE
>>>>YOUR LONG LOST LOVE FALL INTO YOUR ARMS....BULL SHIT!!! I AM SO SURE
>>>>THAT BY
>>>>BREAKING A STUPID CHAIN LETTER THAT THE COMPUTER gods ARE GOING TO
>>>CURSE
>>>>
>>>>ME????? WHAT A CROCK OF SHIT!!!!!
>>>>
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Wish I was there now!!!!!
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My interests:- Cars/Motor Racing
- Comedy
- Health/Fitness
- Movies/TV
- Music: House/Hip-Hop
- Music: R and B, Soul
- Pubs and Clubs
- Sports: American Football
- Sports: Athletics
- Sports: Basketball
- Sports: Sailing/Water Sports
- Sports: Skateboarding, Rollerblading
- Sports: Skiing, Snowboarding, Skating
- Sports: Tennis
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